Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Quote of the Week


Lunch
I've had some extra time to spend lately with The Best Boyfriend In The World. He's been in town all week helping out with the monster bathroom renovation. After all, he started it when he did the eyeball pluck on my tub surround back in November.
Since he's here, he's been picking up my 6th grader from school every day.
Yesterday when I got home from work, he was in the doorway of the bathroom, contemplating a hard day's work. She was splayed out on the floor, contemplating her homework.
I said, "Anybody hungry?"
He said, "Nah, I'm okay. I had a late lunch."
"Oh yeah? What'd you eat?"
"Doritos."
"Really? That's all?"
"Oh no, mom!" said my daughter. "He had some potato chips too."

Monday, January 19, 2009

Space Cowboys




Heard in my living room, yesterday, approx 11:30am:

"Zhoo Zhoo!! Zhoooooo! I got you! I got you with my 
P-38 Space Modulater Transmogrifying Laser Ray Gun!"

"Vweeeeem! Vweeeem! No way! I'm sucking the energy out of your gun with my Meteor Space Oxygen Sucker! You're toast!"

He was running around with an orange foam rod dartgun (without any foam darts) and my new shower head and massager attached by a hose, holding one end up to his face (replacing his oxygen supply, of course), pointing the other end at her. She was decked out in a blue bandanna, black cowboy hat, blue LED glasses without the lenses, and a toy pistol (as well as the energy sucking device), chasing him around the living room, through the kitchen, past the dining room table and back through the hallway into the living room again, occasionally shouting, "We're Space Cowboys!"

I don't think she even knows who Steve Miller is, which just makes it twice as adorable that she must think she came up with that term all by herself.

Separated by 32 years in age, but equal on the playing field, my space cowboys. 

Monday, January 5, 2009

The key to a loving relationship? Loving Yourself.



I was married for a very long time. 17 years. To a very nice man. He's kind, generous, gentle, and a great father. He was never mean to me, never physically hurt me, and never lied to me. Yet I asked for a divorce. Because I didn't like who I was when I was with him. There was just something about our chemistry, about the way we interacted, that left me unsettled. Restless.  I can't quite place my finger on why or exactly what it was, but the bottom line is that I didn't like myself very much. 

I'm not ex-husband bashing. He's a perfectly nice guy. He's the father of the most wonderful daughter in the world, and he's 50% of why she's so great. He was just the wrong guy to be my partner in life.

The reason that I'm bringing all of this up is that in discovering what it was that made my first marriage so wrong, I discovered the exact thing that makes my relationship with the best boyfriend in the world so right, and here it is:

I love who I am when I'm with him.

Pretty simple.

Again, I can't necessarily put my finger on it. Maybe it's just chemistry. Maybe it's our history. Maybe it's improved communication. Maybe it's the desire to try harder. Bottom line is that there is something about the way Eddie and I are together that results in me liking who I am more than I ever have in my entire life. My self-confidence is boosted. My face literally glows. I'm nicer to strangers. I let people go in front of me in line. I smile more. I love myself. And it's not necessarily just because Eddie is always telling me that I'm beautiful and sexy, or that I'm the best girlfriend on the planet. I think it's because I am driven to be a better person when I'm with him, and being a better person makes me feel better about myself. 

What a wonderful feeling it is not only to love an amazing man, and to be loved by this man, but also, and most importantly, to love myself.




Saturday, January 3, 2009

How much do I love thee?


Every couple has a secret little language, their ways of communicating affection and intimacies to each other that's all their own. For Eddie and I, we have a love competition. 
He started it when he left me a voicemail claiming, "I love you more than all the rain in Oregon."
That's a lot.
Since then we've been trying to outdo each other.
I love him more than all the sand on the beaches.
He loves me more than all the water in the oceans.
I love him more than all the stars.
And then he threw down the gauntlet. 
"I love you more than love."

He loves me

He looked at me.
Just looked at me.
And kept looking at me.
Finally, he spoke.
"I love you."
And I knew right there in that moment that there was never a man who was more sincere in all his life.